2005/03/17

"It can't be done."

"Cows don't even sleep standing up." "Yes it can!" "No. It can't!" "My buddies and I did it in college." "No you did not." I am listening to a prairie-dogging cubicle festival of a debate on whether or not cow-tipping can actually be accomplished. Ladies and gentlemen, these are the kind people who are now my co-workers. A few of them maintain that it can't be done. A few of them still believe the dream. I believe that it is time for me to leave for the day.

2005/03/16

Happy St. Patrick's... Eve?

Irish Coffee. A crappy-sounding airport lounge of a drink, a drink for Cold Girls, a supperclub dessert sort of drink, generally served in a really dumb sort of cup. One year ago, at my neighbor Danny's St. Patrick's Day Party, I was offered an Irish coffee and in the spirit of camraderie and gratitude, I accepted. I didn't mention that it would be my first. Naturally, in pure Me style, over the course of approximately three hours I drank the equivalent of three gallons of coffee, 2 liters of whiskey, one quart of heavy whipping cream, and 4 cups of sugar, portioned into roughly 52 tiny clear mugs. As I have discovered with many things, when the ingredients are of quality and are tasty on their own, an appalling idea can actually result in an okay combination. As a result of all of the coffee, I could not stop talking and blinking my eyes and being a really really intent listener for all of the other partygoers huddled around the coffeemaker. The coffee made me happy, but then again, the dark lady rarely disappoints me. The Irish whiskey just made me drunk and slightly melancholy. This year, will I go after a beverage that simultaneously makes me hyper-aware and paranoid of how utterly ridiculous I sound when drinking whiskey? Most likely. Ah... the Irish coffee. Not entirely an upper nor a downer, but a good friend indeed. Just like the Irish. Bottoms up!

Sinead O'Connor Paddywagon Lucky Charm Corned Beef Mother Can You Patch My Pants Go Bragh! Happy Boiled Dinner Three Leaf Clover Lord of The Dance Snake-Banishing St. Patrick's Day!